Home
Home is something I've been trying to recreate ever since I left my parents' house 5 years ago. All my college apartments didn't cut it, as hard as I tried. The rental Joel & I lived in for a year almost felt like home but then we moved as soon as the furniture was placed "just so" & the backyard maples became something I could count on. I'm hopeful our house will become our home in time. It's silly to expect anything else because as thrilling as a new place is, as exhilarating as being on an adventure to unknown land is, it isn't home.
Home is soft moments.
Home is the way the light sits right before dusk.
Home is the smell of bonfire on your clothes.
Home is the way the wood floor creaks as you dance around the room.
Home is the closest of souls housed in sturdy walls.
Staying soft, Em
Week 11/52 of the #52handlettered project with Miranti Kayess (formerly Pen & Peplum)
On a Day Off
The freelance life isn't really conducive to days off (why didn't anyone tell me that a year ago?!) but I was fortunate to have a 4-day weekend with Joel a few weeks back. It was at the end of February when the cabin fever was strong & the sun had been weak long enough. We had to get out of this place for our sanity!
Before we headed north to go snowboarding, I built a shelf out of wood from my Uncle's old barn & transferred all my plants to bigger pots so they'll be ready to take off after the last frost. I'm also trying my hand at propagating succulents & started them, as well.
I learned how to use a circular saw thanks to the shelf-building (it basically works like a sewing machine), got excited about life & how we grow, grow, grow thanks to the plant-transferring & got a whole lot of "fuck!"'s out of my system as I fell down the slopes on my snowboard. You really can't ask for a better day off than that.
Daring to take more days off, Em
Week 10/52 of the #52handlettered project with Miranti Kayess (formerly Pen & Peplum)
How Do You Like Your Coffee?
Lately, Joel & I have been treating ourselves with Aldea Coffee, a local coffee company that sells ethically sourced, high-quality coffee beans in small, fresh batches. Their mission expands beyond the end-product with a processing facility in Honduras that they use to train farmers on environmentally sustainable methods.
What I love about this company is that their process is very personable with strong way values to educate, support & provide meaning for their employees. It's more than just coffee, which makes the coffee even better. We have the Union Blend made by farmers, Victor, Maurico & Martir but we also really like the Espresso Roast.
A dash of sweet is also required for my morning cup. Flavored creamer turned into a bad habit after having it in 3 cups a day every week. Luckily, I found a coffee creamer recipe that's super good, ridiculously easy to make & doesn't tear up my insides. The recipe calls for vanilla but I've also tried it with cinnamon & nutmeg. Both spices did not disappoint!
I don't know a lot about coffee other than how much I absolutely need it to start my day. I'm an addict & not ashamed. Most of my family won't talk to me before I have a sip. I blame this on my momma. Or should I be thanking her for passing on the obsession?
How do you like your coffee?!
Week 9/52 of the #52handlettered project with Miranti Kayess (formerly Pen & Peplum)
Things That Soothe
When I started jotting down what soothes me, I noticed my list items were seasonal. For instance, a hot bath soothes me in the middle of winter while a cold beer on a northern lake sandbar soothes me in the middle of summer. To switch those seasons would make both experiences miserable to me.
However, one thing that soothes me to my core year-round is a good ole chat around the kitchen table.
Because now I have your stories with me & you have mine. We become gatherers of each other's battles won & heartaches. We keep them safe with gut-busting laughs over that embarrassing thing that happened last week. There's not much else that puts me more in the moment like sitting around a table telling stories does.
The Has Heart Herio Series I was a part of last weekend reminded me just how much this soothes me. Oh man, did we talk & talk & laugh & talk! These men & their stories are forever imprinted on me. Not only do I owe them for protecting my freedom but I owe them for breaking my heart wide open. & that's what is so beautiful about table chatter; you talk & you listen & you leave with a high yield from each other's harvest, full & renewed.
May you always sit long enough to listen, Em
PS: The background of this image is of the cutting board Joel made me because we don't have a kitchen table yet. I'm counting down the days until Spring when Joel & his dad start crafting our very own. It will sit in our kitchen nook, hopefully stuffed to the tabletop with laughter, card games & a full harvest. I can't wait!
Week 8/52 of the #52handlettered project with Miranti Kayess (formerly Pen & Peplum)
My Everyday Essentials
This was the first week of the 52 Handlettered Project where I took the picture first & wrote my list second based on the photo styling. Every other week it's been the other way around. I originally started this project to unwind from the day-to-day craze & now it's feeling like another task ON TOP of the day-to-day craze. Does anyone else do this? Turn your fun stuff into work stuff which in turn takes away the fun stuff?
I think it's extremely easy to do if you're in an art-based career because your work is also your heartbeat (or you're just a workaholic). Now that I've thrown myself full force into an art-based career lifestyle—because I've dreamed of doing so for years—my perspective has changed on what it means to "do what you love".
It's laughable now but I used to think "doing what you love" was the EASIER route. ha! The biggest thing I've learned is that doing what you love doesn't mean it's a free for all where you don't have to answer to anyone or that you can jump ship if you get a better offer or that you have complete creative freedom. I suppose it can mean that...if you don't want any clients.
I've realized I actually prefer being black & white in my business while letting a lot of gray into my personal life. It's essential to be your free spirit self in matters of your art, your heart & your imagination. These parts unearth you & you need to let them guide you.
But that isn't a business model.
It isn't a structure that will sustain you if you want to run your own business. I'm not to the point where I'm ok with this realization but I am to the point of seeing definite improvement to my mental stability & stress level when I have more structure with my business. This structure creates breathing room for me to be my fully creative & energetic self rather than my mentally spent & unshowered zombie buried in piles of admin work self.
I've been pondering on a better business structure, my mission as a graphic designer & what my strengths are so I haven't had much time to reflect or meditate, which actually made it very easy to jot down my everyday essentials. They surfaced quickly: his morning kisses, my luminous body oil & taking care of my plants.
And then I think, at the very core of each of us, isn't all we need essentials?
Taking care of mine, Em
Week 7/52 of the #52handlettered project with Miranti Kayess (formerly Pen & Peplum)
A Quote About Love
This quote came to me in a dream this morning. I was in a classroom taking the ACT until I realized I already have my Bachelor's & no longer live in the world of pass or fail. I told the teacher I've been here before so "No, I won't be taking your test".
She nodded, "Kiss it. Then, let it go".
Since this dream was now 17 hours ago, it's making less & less literal sense. How I interpreted it is still important, though.
I realized that until you move on from your past, you may see yourself in it again & again. The same ole battles in a new town or a new job or a new relationship means you may not have learned your lesson yet. I think these patterns repeat in life until the timing is right for you to first, notice them, & second, break them.
I used to think I needed to pass every test (that's where my self-worth was, you see) but after a year full of my biggest struggles to date—in both my work & personal life—I'm just now skimming the surface that there's another way here. It's "self-love" to a degree but it also feels like I'm detaching from this "pass-fail" mentality.
This way is a lot less hard on my mind, body & soul which in turn is a lot less hard on my relationships, career & community. At least that's my intention from now on. It's a momentous realization from a brief sunrise dream. There was so much deep lovey-dovey truth in it for me that I had to put smooches all over everything!
Isn't life so absolutely insane? What was once beautiful to me is now baggage. I kissed it...so I could let it go.
Love, Em
Week 6/52 of the #52handlettered project with Miranti Kayess (formerly Pen & Peplum)
Places to Visit
I put this prompt off a bit because I'm really not sure of a place I want to visit. I know there's a spotlight on wanderlusters & vagabonds in the online world but I haven't felt an urge to hop on a plane since my trip to Seattle 3 summers ago. I would love to visit Ireland, Africa & Australia someday.
When I think about it right now though, I don't want to save for it, plan it or get on a plane to visit it. I'm actually very scared of flying & deep, deep water so flying over the ocean is a mashup of fears I'm not ready to tackle.
However, I've been stuck in my house & studio (going to blame it on the weather). I'm barely able to convince myself to walk to yoga so I do have places I need to visit for my sanity. Yoga is one of those places & the library being the other.
There are many worlds tucked away in a library. So many in fact that most of them you can't fly to because they only exist in the mind, the fantasy world, other realms, in the past, etc. It's an all-expense-paid trip to anywhere in the Universe you want to go. It will surely change you.
My upcoming travel plans: an ancient community in a red tent, a small farm in southern Appalachia, & returning to the home of my wild nature.
Safe travels, Em
PS: After 4 years of making my hand lettering digital, I FINALLY discovered an amazing way to isolate my type from this post on Spruce Rd. Thanks, Jamie! I nerd out big time when I find a tool or technique that makes my process better. If you're looking to make your hand lettering digital, watch this quick tutorial. I promise you'll love it!
Week 5/52 of the #52handlettered project with Miranti Kayess (formerly Pen & Peplum)
Unanswered Questions
When I think back to the summer of 2014, I gotta tell you, I don't remember much of it. I was blessedly knee-deep in my first handful of projects as a full-time freelancer. I only noticed the sunshine when it reflected off my computer screen. Only felt the warmth when it blew through the window of my studio.
It was the first week of August by the time I made it to the beach that I lived 5 minutes away from.
Fortunately, my focus led me to a good place within. I read this quote the other day & finally understood what I was up to all last summer. Missed meals, moonlit work nights, no idea what my friends were up to but...but...I started to feel a rumbling inside me. My quaking hands were a good sign. I looked at my fear & said "hello". I know I'm making this sound like it was easy. I know it seems romantic. Sometimes saying how hard things are makes them harder & then you can't see the good in them so please, take this wrong way.
Like a stretch during yoga your body doesn't feel ready to do. Breathe into it. Breathe into your unanswered questions. Inhaling & exhaling, Em.
Week 4/52 of the #52handlettered project with Miranti Kayess (formerly Pen & Peplum)
Embrace Messy
I'm reading The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron. It's a book that helps artists recover after burnout & rediscover their creativity (at least that's what I'm hoping it'll do for me).
It's very easy for me to think perfection is where happiness lies, especially working in the design field where pixel-perfect is standard & well-thought-out concepts drive the entire project. I mean, that kind of makes you want to get it right the first time.
I do my best to offset this when I'm away from the screen with hobbies like taking care of my succulents, writing & sketching but the problem with a perfectionist mentality is that it doesn't have a timeframe. It badgers you when you're watering the plants, digging its claws into your psyche; "These are going to die, you don't know how to take care of living things".
It pops into your head at the end of a run-on sentence as you're spilling your heart out onto the page; "Who do you think you are? You're not a writer!"
It even takes away the 2 weeks of fun you had simply doodling away fun words as a weekly project. It starts comparing you to others so much that you don't open your sketchbook all week out of fear.
The beautiful thing about being an artist (which I will forever argue all of us are) is that you can take this negative self-talk or your ruminating thoughts & turn it into something compelling. It could be bright strokes on a canvas, it could be a heartfelt story told in black & white, it could be a universal message that will guide someone to a perspective they needed to see that day. Whatever happens, that's not the part you're attached to as an artist. You don't even have to share it with anyone. You just feel the urge that you must. get. this. out. So you honor it.
I had to get this out.
I'm craving to embrace my messy as a human being because I'm tired of swearing at the vacuum when I get tangled around the chord. I'm over listening to my gremlins telling me I can't keep things living (tell that to my fiddle fig I'm SAVING right now) & I sure as hell AM a writer. I'm writing right now.
It has nothing to do with the curated images I see on social media, that's the least of the platforms I'm playing victim to. We have to all know at this point that images online don't tell the whole story. It's silly to aspire to one morsel of someone else's bigger picture.
Listen. Learn. Love.
& then set that aside so you can hear what you're telling yourself.
Are you talking to yourself kindly? Are you letting you speak up & out & in circles?
This is messy. It's all coming out in jumbles. My heart just got lighter. Embrace your messy.
Cheers, Em
Week 3/52 of the #52handlettered project with Miranti Kayess (formerly Pen & Peplum)
His Neck
Protection. Strength. Gentleness.
I see Joel's neck a lot. He's tall. I'm small. My eyes meet his neck, naturally. It's the part of him I equate to morning hugs, afternoon kisses, bedtime cuddles.
He's going to hate that I've dedicated a whole post to a sketch of his neck but he posted this the other night so we're even. Even is something we try to be a lot. We have a lot of the same life values but it's important to each of us to respect each other's individuality. A dream for a dream, a day of vacuuming for a day of loading dishes, a weekend in for a weekend out, etc.
For 5 years, I've been in the healthiest relationship of my life. I've done a lot of destructive things out of fear & doubt to test this relationship's limits but we've held strong, even if a little wobbly at times. We're both broken but it's an act of true human selflessness to be with someone willing to help you piece things together (& to tell you when you need to piece that shit together yourself).
A lot of transformations are happening with both of us, individually & together, right now but I hope I never take for granted how good it feels to end a long day nuzzled in the crook of his neck.
Sweet dreams to you & yours. xo, Em
Summer Love List
It's weird thinking about what I love most about summer when I see a foot of snow outside but the sun keeps showing up so if I close my eyes & face towards the light, I can almost hear waves & smell sand. It's amazing how much of a mood-lifter sunshine brings. I know my fiddle fig is taking it all in, as am I.
Sometimes I wonder about people living in warmer states & countries stumbling upon a Michigander's blog like mine. I would hope they pity me for the things I do to stay upbeat during these winter months. Or that they're grateful one of their problems is not pulling up to the McDonald's drive-thru to find their car window frozen shut as they're ready to order their highly-sought-after-in-times-of-stress french fries.
Either way, waking up to the sunrise this week has been a pleasure. It's dangerous to be thinking of warmer days this early into winter but I've dared to dream in the name of practicing my hand lettering! Once again, a project I've joined in the name of having no expectations for myself & purely enjoying the act.
Week 1 was heavy & cathartic for me.
Week 2 feels bright & awake.
I could go on & on about this list but I don't have a paddleboard yet & Joel would be the first to tell you I've only done beach yoga once (it starts at 6am!) so it's more of a wish list. The thing I'm most excited about though is having bonfires at our new home. Having people over for a laidback night of stories, music & laughter fills me up with love. Plus, the previous owners hooked the TV up to speakers that play off the back deck. Party!
Dare I ask, what are you looking forward to this summer?! Cheers, Em
Week 2/52 of the #52handlettered project with Miranti Kayess (formerly Pen & Peplum)
Do Hard Things
Yikes, does that seem like a demand? It is. Not in a screaming football coach kind of way. More like an "I'm Oprah & I believe in you, sweetie" kind of way. Or like a Glennon Doyle Melton in her book Carry On, Warrior kind of way. Yes, that's it.
It’s where I first heard we can do hard things. I wondered if anything was going to come to me this new year. I don't put much thought into resolutions because my year begins in August, which is when I like to set my intentions. Maybe it's birthday bias or maybe it's my belief that the middle of winter isn't the best time to expect so much of ourselves. Either way, this phrase did indeed come to me after a phone call with Mama Moon a few days ago.
We were trying to decipher a good word for her upcoming year (her birthday is in December. This makes sense to me). Growth was what we landed on after weeding through a tangle of heavier words no shining mother like mine should begin her year off with. It was decided & we laughed & we set our phones down with a light touch. And then she called again that night.
I began to listen for our laughing we left off with but she was teary & crying this time. Summer, our dog & my sister, took a turn for the worst & they had to lay her down for her final rest. It's a call I've been dreading for the last 3 months because Summer wasn't her youngest self anymore but she's been with us for 91 years of her life. I was hoping she would make it well past 1,000 because fairytales are my frequency. As I was holding on tight to Summer & I's memories & washing away the heaviness of grief in the shower that night, I heard a voice tell me, "You can do hard things."
I've never found this clear & calm voice odd for how little I've heard it in my life. In fact, I think I would hear it more if I was open to it. It sits in a little pocket between my intuition & my fear & I have never doubted it.
You can do hard things.
Like getting out of bed the next morning after saying goodbye to sweet & strong Summer Girls, crying as you smile at the sunlight (I see you, Summer). Like sitting in silence with yourself & enjoying the company. Like coming to terms with the reality that checking your inbox obsessively isn't going to get you your dream job. No, the hard thing is to go out & get it. Like not getting on Instagram every hour to fill a void that you think your imperfect life can't do for you (hint: the hard thing is to be awake to see your imperfect life is filling the void. It's just that your head's in the phone, so you can't see it.)
You can do hard things. We can do hard things together.
It almost feels like I'm summoning hard things but I'm not. It's just that stuff can be hard but we're doing them so it's almost like a celebration of life, these doing hard things. & I'm always down for a celebration.
All the love, Em
Week 1/52 of the #52handlettered project with Miranti Kayess (formerly Pen & Peplum).
A Message from My Muse
Darling, There's a current in you I've painstakingly watched you douse with negative self-talk & a hustle that makes me shiver to the bone. I'm sure you haven't seen it because you're only keeping your eye out for clean cuts, snip snip, but I've seen it. A little rip here, a tiny tear there, sweeping dust under the rug over there. These things slowly try to fade me away from you, you know.
This is an urgent matter because I've been around a lifetime or two & I've witnessed how this self-induced pressure makes lambs out of lionesses, how it puts out the innate fires of genius' obsessed with unearthing universal truths. And when I saw you the other day bawling into your overworked hands, carrying on about wisdom teeth fees & health insurance shortcomings, I saw an artist ready to surrender her gifts in the name of dental work & doctor's visits. Given my nature & my unconditional love for you, I just can't let you do that.
Your pursuit to patch up the rips & tears like a child's scraped-up knee patched with a kiss & a band-aid is a noble one. Your resilience at tirelessly fixing yourself is commendable but I must say, it's a little overkill & precisely where you lost your electricity. You fixed it right out of you.
I watched your bright-eyed wonder of living a creative life quickly change to an expectation that nothing was acceptable if it wasn't a pristine masterpiece, tidily wrapped & perfect all over. I tried to stop you from falling in love with the ritz & the want because I know how it tempts you into thinking your life will begin as soon as you have all the right projects, the right relationships, the right furniture.
I used to call you a silly girl when you got this craze of believing right would fill you up but now I call you human because you're not the only one learning from your mistakes, my dear. I want you to never forget your rips & tears & messy piles are part of you. That doesn't mean they have to define you. Life will hand you enough heaviness, you don't need to go out looking for it. But it's crucial you hear that I love you because of your messy. It's often in these places you find me & then we create wonderful things together. Embrace it as I embrace you.
Your current will reignite in your veins. Your eyes will light up. Gosh, you look so beautiful when your eyes light up. I'm not really one to sit back & watch so I had to tell you this at the exact moment I saw your light leave. I hope you're not upset, I just desperately want to make messes with you again. I will wait to feel your current in my fingertips & when I do, I'll hold you a second longer than you're comfortable with. I love you, after all.
With open arms, Your Muse
Shine & Wine
The sun is so rare this time of year in Michigan but today he showed his lovely face. These days, I never know when he'll be in town so I closed the studio doors to soak him up on a long trail walk with Tiger. Tiger chased squirrels. I caught up with my thoughts:
The Liebster Award by Hayley of Roots & Whim
The Liebster Award is given to new bloggers by new bloggers which is how Hayley of Roots & Whim came to nominate me (newbies unite!). I love that this award exists because it creates a welcoming community to people who've started a new journey of their own. I'm honored to have been nominated, thank you Hayley! I've passed it along to Megan of Chat Clink Repeat & Julie of Whimsy & Wild. I answered my questions & put a little twist on the rules here. Fellow bloggers with less than 200 followers, please join in! Hayley lays out the original deets & rules wonderfully here.
Trello for project management
Talk about a freelance lifesaver. Trello is a free resource that allows you to organize your projects from a large scale down to the minute details. It's intuitive & easy to share tasks, files & deadlines with team members, as well as comment on them & chat directly. It also puts tasks into calendar form which is easy on the eyes for us strictly visual folks.
The Day Designer by Whitney English
The power of Twitter, my friends. Yes, I'm 5 years late to the phenomenon of just how useful Twitter is but it led me to the best 2015 planner a girl could ask for so I don't mind my pace one bit. Donned with a thick cover, beautiful paper, top priority tasks, daily gratitude & best of all, a reminder for dinner! Best. Planner. Ever. If you're looking for a 2015 Day Planner there's a few Day Designer's left here or check out Elle & Co, she has a great self-printable planner!
OnGuard Essential Oil Blend by doTerra
I recently went to an Essential Oils 101 class at Have Company where I uncovered more hidden gems about essential oils thanks to Tess Lindholm, a local doTerra rep & health coach. Sick days are hard to have when you've got a boss like mine (she runs a hard bargain!) so I've been using 1–2 drops of OnGuard in my hot drinks & soups as soon as my throat got sore & nose got runny.
Wine night with friends
I'm excited to hang out with Megan, Tieka & friends tomorrow for a holiday wine night! We're doing a blind taste testing of seasonal wines like mulled, spice or cabernet. I have no idea what that means. I'm more of a craft beer drinker but still can't wait for a night of wine & relaxation. Any suggestions on good wine under $20 I should bring?
I read this great article about genuine excitement when selling your service. It came at the perfect time since I'm now a offering a brand starter package called the Design Blitz for entrepreneurs, bloggers & shop owners who need a logo. Selling usually has an icky feeling tied to it. No one wants to be sold to, they want to be understood. It isn't because I'm trying to manipulate people into giving me their money (how selling often feels). It's because I've seen a thread of frustration, confusion & ambiguity in people at the beginning of the brand process that doesn't need to be there. How do I instill that trust & show you I truly mean it? The initial idea was simple: I made this for you because you told me you needed it. It's more efficient, less blurry. The Design Blitz is a process with tangibles instead of words that never become action. Yes, these are the thoughts racing through my head as Tiger chases squirrels up trees (he's never caught one).
Good vibes & sunshine, friends. –xo, Em
Focus for the Holidays
This may be the most wonderful time of the year but it’s also the most difficult time of the year to stay focused on work tasks, client deadlines & your blog calendar (or is that just me?). There’s gifts to be purchased, family events to attend & lots of spiked egg-nog to drink. I’ve gathered 5 quick & cozy ways to remain focused on your to-do’s so you can fully appreciate the chaos & comfort that this beautiful season brings. From my studio to yours:
1. Get outdoors
Bundle up & get out there! A quick walk/activity outside is good for your lungs, legs & overall mood. When I started freelancing, I let my inbox determine my schedule first thing in the morning. This usually meant skipping lunch & being in reaction mode all day. I recently replaced this bad habit with a 20-minute morning walk. It slows my pace to “realistic”, clears my head & sets the tone for the rest of my day.
2. Drink hot lemon water
Megan Gilger of The Fresh Exchange recently shared that she drinks hot lemon water as part of her morning routine. I liked her idea & did the same once the snow began to fall (yes, already a foot & counting on the Michigan Lakeshore!). It soothes my throat after a chatty lunch date or client call & puts a refreshing spin on the most simple & best drink for you.
3. Wear your favorite sweater
Tending to client needs & task lists in your favorite sweater is the work day equivalent to cuddling up on the couch with your favorite blanket watching reruns of Gilmore Girls (thank you, Netflix) or that book you’ve been meaning to start. Sometimes I tell myself, “Rock the sweater & to-do list now so you can fully enjoy the blanket & book tonight.” Nothing wrong with a little self-imposed ultimatum, right?
4. Spread good vibes
Good energy in your workspace means good work, writing & creating. What gives you good vibes? Integrate that into your day to keep interested in the task at hand. It’s about enjoying the moment & reminding yourself that you hustle so hard because you love this shit (especially when you’d rather be building snowmen & decorating the Christmas tree)!
5. Crank up the holiday music
I’ve gone from Nat King Cole’s Christmas Song to Whitney Houston’s Holiday Album to Frank Sinatra’s Jolly Christmas & it isn’t even December yet! But with the snow softly falling outside & the heat cranking up inside, I feel so spirited a little work to fulfill promises I made doesn’t feel like an unwelcomed blizzard. It feels like giving a gift…& everyone knows giving is better than receiving.
May your workdays be merry & bright. Cheers! Em
You can also find this post on The Blog Loft, a great resource for bloggers looking to collaborate. Thanks for letting me share my focus essentials, Margo!
Woman, Warrior & Artist
I'm still that girl who checks out her books from the librarian, walking right past the self-serve kiosk in search of some CONNECTION. I'm also the girl holding up the line digging for change to pay the overdue balance, wishing I would've just checked out at the damn self-serve one where fees don't exist until they put a hold on your account. This happened to a "friend of mine", otherwise I'd have no idea the library didn't let you renew more than 2 times or cut you off at a $10 maximum overdue balance.
Anyway, if I was asked to explain what I'm going through lately or where my head’s at, I'd ramble off these 4 titles. Reading books gets me giddy because I don't find them, they find me (& Tiger too, apparently). I haven't read these through yet so here's a peek inside via the ole tried & true Bill Shake Method*:
How To Be a Woman by Caitlin Moran
“Personally, I find the idea that women are supposed to “love” shopping bizarre—nearly every woman I know wants to cry after 45 minutes of trawling the high street looking for a shirt and hits the gin with alacrity upon the sad occasions when jeans have to be found.”
Carry On, Warrior by Glennon Doyle Melton
“And every single time, he sets up his mat right next to mine. Every single time. Sometimes he even moves my water bottle to get closer to me. And he smells and he coughs throughout the entire class. He smells and he coughs so insistently and consistently that when the instructor says to breathe deeply, I’m not sure that’s in my best interest.”
The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron
“It is important to be able to sort useful criticism from the other kind. Often we need to do the sorting out for ourselves, without the benefit of a public vindication. As artists, we are far more able to do this sorting than people might suspect. Pointed criticism, if accurate, often gives the artist an inner sense of relief: “Ah, hah! so that’s what was wrong with it.” Useful criticism ultimately leaves us with one more puzzle piece for our work.”
The Renaissance Soul by Margaret Lobenstine
“No matter what your future plans, you may want to take a year off after high school or college. Perhaps you need a break between formal education & whatever comes next. Maybe you want time to further explore your values & focal points. You may even decide that you want some additional “growing up” time before taking life’s next step.”
*Bill Shake Method is something I invented when I got The Complete Works of William Shakespeare at a book sale. I was 19 & couldn't make a decision to save my life so I turned to the ever-so-wise—& even more confusing—Bard with the beard to give me some insight on what to do in moments of indecision. You open the book to a random page, close your eyes & point. Read what you landed on & there's your answer. Think of it as the Magic 8 ball for book-loving women who can't commit.
What are you reading lately?!
Why Brave Girl?
I became unattached from a crucial truth recently: People are people. It's seems ignorantly obvious, right? I've been so caught up with "pick me" guest blog applying, "I see you" tweeting & "follow me, damnit" notification checking that the core of me slipped away a bit. I saw myself dissolving into the screen, longing for acceptance from avatars & snapshots. But then I woke to the first snow of the season. It came in fluffy white flakes, the familiar cool drops of clarity landing onto my rosy cheeks. I put my knit socks on, shut down my laptop & listened to the person sitting in front of me. I looked into their eyes. It broke the ice building inside of me. This moment is for us.
Warmth. Eyes bright with understanding. Visions. Sipping hot drinks while smiling.
"Why Brave Girl? What does it mean?" It turned my moments of listening into a question that felt like those snowflakes. Clarity. "What a wonderful question. Thank you for asking. "My politeness was a stall tactic (although it was a truly thoughtful question).
Why Brave Girl?
It all poured out: "Can I let you in on a secret? I am scared of many things. Brave Girl is an aspiration. It is also a reminder to people putting a microscope on their weaknesses & a blind eye to their strengths to stop doing that, myself included. We need both to be whole. You are worthy simply because you are here. Showing up as YOU is one of the most courageous acts in your life. I want to celebrate my wholeness more than I want to be ruled by the exhaustive effort of trying to be good enough until I can do so."
I was teary-eyed by the end of it. Life is emotional, exhausting & eye-opening but it is never too much. We all deserve to be here. For you, Em.
Another Shower Story
Last year, I started questioning the ingredients in my bathroom products because I couldn't pronounce them & hated how the bright-colored bottles turned my attempt at serenity in the shower into a college rave of neon colors. I've learned a lot since my last shower story.
I've been slowly weeding out my chemical-based products with closer-to-organic ones, especially after meeting Teri at Sérendipité Organiques in East Hills, Grand Rapids. She has a wealth of knowledge, dispels many organic myths & completely lives out what she preaches. I have a soft spot for people who start a business to share with others the good they're already doing at home.
Most people I've talked to hesitate to try natural products due to expense or sensitive skin concerns. The price increase is worth it to me because these highly concentrated products generally last longer. Just because it's natural or organic doesn't always mean it's the best mix for your skin type though so I often research ingredients before use.
I've gathered a list of natural products working for me in hopes it'll cut down your trial & error time if you've been wanting to try natural alternatives but aren't sure where to start:
Shower Basics
Yep, I only use 4 things. 2 of them I use every other day & 1 is mainly for a fresh shower scent so if you haven't thought, "this girl is such a hippie" yet, now's the time. Momma calls me minimal, Daddy calls me dirty but these are the things I love to talk about & use regularly-ish:
Shampoo by Organic Matter, $16
My experiment with the rosemary tea tree shampoo last year was a flop. The crown of my head got real greasy since my pores were finally allowed to "breathe". My hair turned coarse & unbrushable. Whoever said beauty is pain must have switched to natural shampoo. It was a 6-month struggle to get a brush through my hair until I chopped it all off & started using this. My head is now mostly toxin-free & silky smooth after 1 week. I use a dime-sized amount every other day so yeah, it'll last forever.
Conditioner by Organic Matter, $16
Part 2 to getting my hair back to its natural state was this matching conditioner. I stopped by Teri's one day in a tizzy—greasy top-knot & all—when she suggested using a conditioner with shampoo to balance my natural oils & decrease build-up. Is this a Hair 101 rule I didn't know about? It's a rule I'm sticking to because it's working.
Chamomile & Lavender Soap by Bubble & Bee, $4
Still have my pile of all-natural bar soaps I'm working through. I got 5 bars for my birthday so my family's either real supportive or not-so-subtly telling me I stink. Did you know a 100% organic soap doesn't exist? It's true but I love the smell of earthy ingredients so I'm stickin' with.
Peppermint Oil by Now, $7
A recent obsession. Peppermint oil smells so fresh & wakes me up in the morning. It helps relieve headaches & motion sickness so I use it on long road trips too. I prefer essential oils from Rocky Mountain Oils but picked this up at the local health food store in a pinch.
Treat Yoself Essentials
My natural alternatives are quickly making their way past the shower doors & into the bathroom cabinet. I'm thinking of doing a natural makeup round-up in the near future. Does anyone have a great organic foundation they use? I'm at a loss.
Spearmint & Tea Tree Pit Putty by Bubble & Bee, $8
This is a gem I want everyone in the world to wear because it smells amazing & continues to smell amazing all day long. Plus, it isn't an antiperspirant meaning this putty won't plug your sweat glands with aluminum-based compounds. Antiperspirants also alter armpit bacteria negatively & can make you smell worse in the long run. I've tried 3 other natural stick deodorants but none made me feel I found my armpit soulmate as much as this one.
Cool Cucumber Facial Cleanser by Bubble & Bee, $15
Still warming up to this one but I've found using it both morning & night is most effective for my skin type. It's gentle cleansing & free of synthetic detergents, preservatives & artificial fragrances so it won't make your skin sensitive or bacterial resistant. It's been difficult for me to see if it's really working because my foundation is undoing everything this cleanser does (another reason I'm on the lookout for a new foundation).
Luminous Body Oil by Herbivore Botanicals, $28
This baby lasted me 9 months & the current scent is a lower price than what I originally got mine for. I feel so moisturized & cozy after putting it on post-shower. No artificial or animal ingredients, parabens, fragrances, unnatural preservatives, or animal testing on their products or ingredients. The ingredients are crafted to be completely therapeutic.
Relaxing Lavender Mineral Bath Salts by Aura Cacia, $3
I don't know that this product is natural or organic at all but the scents put me in bathtime zen I think I've been waiting for all my life. From the relaxing lavender to the tranquil chamomile, I treat these like collector's items. Except for the fact that I use them. A lot.
Learning from people making a conscious effort to offer well-crafted products free from harmful chemicals & cruel animal practices has become quite a hobby of mine. It fills me up to have a home filled with hard work & intention. Sérendipité is a local organic body care shop I've had a great experience with because I've learned so much from the shop owner, Teri. Because we share a lot of the same views,
Teri is giving any Grand Rapids Brave Girl interested in organic body care goods a discount* for the month of November at Sérendipité. Just mention you're a Brave Girl reader! Hopefully, this offer will help if you want to try out a few products on a budget. Any essentials in your home you can't do without?
This post is not sponsored by Sérendipité Organiques & I'm not an affiliate for any of the products mentioned. It's my unpaid opinion, my fresh experiences with natural products, & my hopes that you'll stop by my generous friend's beautiful shop if you're inspired to. –Love, Emily
*Discount is not valid on some product lines, during events, or with other specials/offers.
Full Moons & Freakouts
Technically, the freak out happened last weekend but I'm still hungover from it & the full moon has been in Taurus since last night so expect any rages or freakouts to be the exact topic you need to dig deeper on right now. I know this. Mystic Mamma told me so. This week was a lot of head-down work & prepping clients for the upcoming holiday season but I did take a breath of air long enough for:
Holiday decorating at the greenhouse
It's my first holiday season at the greenhouse meaning I had to "fluff" the trees. After 5 trees fluffed, I understood why it was a job for the new girl. We turned on Christmas music, most customers came in & said "too early" but no, it's never too early to celebrate the most wonderful time of the year!
The Jess Lively Show with Erin Loechner
Erin's blog, Design for Mankind, was one of the first I ever read. I love the way she plays with words & finds a connection between every day & the bigger picture. Hearing her speak on freelancing, family & quitting the rat race was a 50-minute long moment of clarity for me.
A quick visit from Meg
Working from home makes me crave the time I have with friends. It's been me & this screen all week so time with Meg was refreshing. We slowed down long enough to chat about the challenges & celebrations we've had lately. One of hers being the cutest little boy they've just welcomed into their family! I smiled as she backed down the driveway & yelled out her window, "Hang in there!"
Hannah Brencher's writing
This girl is reading my mind. She kept me up way late this week with chills from her intuitive words. What stuck the most: "You're okay. Stop looking for a reason to not be okay."
Gettin' schooled by Sian Richardson's Biz + Self-Employment articles
Sian's story is similar to mine with the exception of being in the game longer & not working with plants. At least, I don't think she has. She's a kickass brand + ebooks designer who calls it as she sees it & solidified the icky feeling I had about affiliate programs. The biggest takeaway for me though: "...[as a creative] it's not your job to regurgitate what everyone else is already doing or talking about." It's so easy to seek out inspiration as a procrastination tool now (hello, Pinterest!) but it leads to a black hole creatively. I want my clients to have a visual avenue to express what's inside of them not express a replicated exterior of someone else. It's a lot of heart work but every time I follow this harder path, I'm much happier with the results (& so are my clients!).
Earth is prepping for the slow season this week. The lake's gone quiet, the wind is lazy. I'm setting my sights on a cozy & slow weekend too. What are your plans?! Peace + freakouts, brave ones.
Gratitude & Dream-Makin'
I like little vignettes. One tiny piece of a story that allows the viewer to wonder what's happening outside of the calculated frame. Kind of like when you see a design portfolio or an Instagram account & you're like, "Man, this designer has her shit together!"
We don't see the chaos of her coffee-infused late-night scramble to meet a deadline, her apprehension to email a professional she admires, or even at 4am when she wakes up in a sweat, haunted by her to-do list & the nagging deeper question, "Why do I care again?".
I love these raw moments because they give refined beauty some serious street cred. It wasn't easy for you, was it? I respect the hard hustle. Moments like this are coming to Brave Girl because I'm grateful for the choice I made to be a freelance designer every day but I'd be lying if I said being your own boss is easy & tax season doesn't suck & I know exactly what I'm doing.
My little vignette this week has a lot to do with gratitude & getting started with some fresh dreams for my new studio:
Influential Objects
A calcite pink stone & a lucky penny have joined forces to transform what used to be a little girl's room with life-sized Madagascar characters into the studio of my dreams. The one where I don old painting shirts & jingly handmade jewelry all day, making art & people's dreams come true. The calcite, aka The Reiki Stone, nurtures my heart chakra & fills it with universal & self-love. It reminds me to dance & paint my walls pink. I found the penny under a baseboard when I was prepping to paint & immediately decided to infuse copper into the mix instead of the go-to gold. I wouldn't be upset if this studio made some money in the near future so I'm channeling pennies people! One-by-one if I have to.
A night of painting
Christened my new studio with a night of painting & listening to Eckhart Tolle talk about the pain body.
Applied to be a guest blogger on Unfancy
Caroline Joy uses Unfancy as her platform to share her personal style & love for minimalism. I really believe in what's she doing & made a Capsule Wardrobe myself thanks to her. I applied to be a guest on her blog in hopes I can share my experience with style as a freelance designer working from home. I don't hear much about the "what do I wear?" challenge when your commute is a 5-second walk to the studio. Do other freelancers get tempted to stay in yoga pants all day or do you dare to wear heels when no one is watching? I'll find out in a few weeks if I got the gig or not. Fingers crossed!
The chair of my dreams
One of my 2015 Business Dreams is to get a new office chair. This one, bright & beautiful as it is, has my back in all sorts of knots. Step 1 to a successful studio? A good fricken chair.
Alt Summit Gratitude Chat
Joined my first #altchat on Twitter this week where we talked gratitude. It made me grateful to be surrounded by people who support me & remind me to keep going in the direction that feels right for me. You never have to feel alone. People show up. I "met" new friends, gained new perspectives on thankfulness & got a great idea for a shirt because of it. Success!
Business Dreams thanks to The Every Girl
Getting more serious about my financial & business dreams after reading The Every Girl. It led to an eye-opening chat with a friend this week about why talking about money shouldn't be taboo. We agreed being more open about rates & salary expectations would create a more accurate value standard in the creative field as well as elevate women's perspectives on knowing their true worth professionally & otherwise. Maybe it's a touchy subject because we don't talk about it enough?
Employee of the Week
I took Thursday off from everything work-related (phone off, laptop sealed shut) & gave Tiger "Employee of the Week". His plaque should be in soon!
Happy Halloween, friends! Chose a chili cook-off & installing new lighting in our house over dressing up & going out this year. Taking my friend's idea for a costume & being an "adult". It has its perks. :) If you're local, I suggest going to AIGA West Michigan's Halloween Party tonight. I'm a total Aaron Draplin fan girl & he's the main event! xo, Em